9.13.2007

I can smell what The Rock is cooking, and it appears he is sauteeing a shit

Haven't I seen this movie before? Big tough guy babysits a bunch of kids and a dog? Wait, let's narrow that down a little. Big tough guy who no longer has any form of gainful employment who is one paycheque away from sucking dick for creatine babysits a bunch of kids and a dog? Yeah, that's better. I have seen this before!What the fuck, Disney? Who the hell are you getting to do these posters for you, a 15 year old? And is he doing them the night before? After Lost? Jesus Christ, its the same goddamned typeface and everything! When will this horrible circle of shitty tough guy-cum-babysitter movies end?What does Hulk Hogan think about this? I bet I know what Hulk Hogan is thinking:
Come onnnnn, get it together Hulkster! Brooke's Sexual Re-Assignment Surgery isn't going to pay for itself. Oh noooooo, The Hulkster's brooooke! Hulkamania isn't what it used to be!
Who is really going to see The Game Plan? 9-year-old boys are too young to remember the days of can you smelllllllll and Jabronis and what not, and the people who remember that (me) wouldn't see this movie if I was given free tickets. And free popcorn. And a free back massage. You'd pretty much have to cut me a cheque for $1000 in order for me to willingly sit through The Game Plan. But I will tell you what i will be seeing this weekend. Mr. Woodcock.Pfft, pack up the haterade. Billy Bob Thornton is really really funny (and Bad Santa was sadly underrrated).
I'll give you a review on Tuesday (cause Monday will be a new Interview!!)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

http://www.metacritic.com/film/titles/mrwoodcock

Ebert liked it, but otherwise lots of hate.