Is it too late to nominate someone for the Kennedy Centre Honours?!

Okay, so I have no idea what the Kennedy Centre Honours are, but I do know they happen in Washington and are somewhat prestigious. Do we know if the Nobel Prize has some sort of category for the Arts? I sure hope so, because I have discovered a gem. Last night at the gym, my headphones were plugged into a music channel on TV and I was treated to Ashlee Simpson's newest music video Outta My Head (Ay Ya Ya). And let me tell you; my life has been changed. This is the most original, grounbreaking video I have seen. Not since Thriller has the audience been held captive in awe at such greatness. From the Gwen Stefani-esque surrealism, What You Waiting For-like costumes and set design, and Gwen Stefani-esque vocal range and tone all the way to the No Doubt-like straight jacket scenes, I was baffled. How has an artist, nay...and artiste, like Ashlee Simpson and her completely originial talents gone under tha radar for so long? Well, she can now add another classic to the Simpson catalogue of totally original songs, along with Boyfriend (stellar), La La (pure poetry), L-O-V-E (words cannot describe it), and Pieces of Me (power ballad).
It's no doubt that Ashlee has a classic song on her hands here, but the video? Can we not nominate music videos for the Short Film category at the Academy Awards? Because this would sweep the ceremony for sure. Never has imagery on film been so original and never-before-seen. I can just imagine the look on Jack Nicholson's face as he opens the envelope to see Outta My Head win it's 17th Oscar.
Now, while this video is as close to perfect as you can get (I'd say its 99.99% of the way there) you can always add a few more elements to make it really reach up to Heaven and touch God. Here are a few things I would add to make this video extend to extreme greatness (or X-tremess G). The following ideas are completely original and are property of my amazing brain:

- Have Ashlee dance in the street with an animated street-wise cat named MC Skat Kat

- Ashlee could go back and forth between our world and the illustrated world of a comic book (maybe because she could fall in love with a boy from there). This will work particularily well if she does this in an 80's diner.

- Ashlee playing guitar in a grungy band in a low-ceilinged basement while dozens of disillusioned youth dance mopely around her (I call it 'moshing'). Maybe another established artist could cameo on the drums. Maybe someone from Foo Fighters or Queens of the Stone Age or something.

- Ashlee could be dancing beside a waterfall, and then at some point will actually turn into a water version of herself and dance on water.

- Ashlee's hands could turn into claymation sledgehammers and hit her in the face.

- Ashlee could dress up like a living doll (like Barbie) and live in a world of all of Barbie's things. Pete Wentz could be her doll boyfriend (Ken?)

- A segment could have everything, including Ashlee, made out of lego (Gondry might be a good director for this).

- Ashlee could be a singer in a club and Melissa Joan Hart would be a waitress, and there would be a choreographed dance number.

- Ashlee could sing on the roof of a building (this one might be hard to pull off - in order for the sound to travel, you have to actually play live. Also Outside = Snipers).


ilana said...

There is also her inclusion of Wondershowzen-esque creeeepy twiiiins

Anonymous said...

The closest Miss Ashlee/leigh/ly will ever dream of getting to a KCH is pouring coffee at the KC cafe! or a MMVA nomination.

The Mayor said...

Ahahaha, that's amazing (and very true). She also might be the date of someone going, or sneak in.

alex davey illustrations said...

You know what, after watching this several times (twice) I think, just maybe, MAYBE, Ashlee is actually a genius and implying she can't get Gwen Stefani out of her head and that she thinks Gwen's music is mindless and actually a rip off of other examples of imagery. She basically wears EVERYTHING Gwen wears in the videos (Sweet Escape: black and white geometric dress, What You Waiting For: the Alice in Wonderland top hats and her as bascially Gulliver in Gulliver's Travels, and No Doubts It's My Life: Stray jacket ie: Orange Prison attire)
But then, no. She is dating Pete Wentz afterall.

Anonymous said...

I think Alex Davey Illustrations is high.

Roger Mexico said...

creeeepy twiiiins

um, that was Diane Arbus, who was swiped by Stanley Kubrick in Stephen King mode;