Year End Review: Telebishin

Good morning friends!! I trust you all had a good weekend. And to my Jewish readers (all 7 of you) I hope you had funning spinning dreidels last night (...and for the next 7 nights). Anyways, I took some heat over my choices for last week's 2008 Internet picks (what is this, The Webbys?) so I will no doubt get many a rolling eye or sarcastic scoff over my...

12. Fringe
Typically I don't give a rat's ass about new network shows; they usually suck and are cancelled after about 3 episodes, so I just can't be bothered giving them a try. I will be honest when I say that the only reason I started watching Fringe is because Pacey Witter is in it. But I was surprised, because it's actually good. I don't see it lasting (as there are more than enough sci-fi crime solving shitshows on network right now) but I have thoroughly enjoyed every episode I have seen so far.

11. Mad Men
I know, I know - everybody loves Mad Men.

10. Human Giant
I am very much in love with Aziz Ansari, but I know he is too short for me. I am very very tall and he is very very tiny. Paul Scheer's teeth make me uncomfortable. Rob Huebel reminds me of a Jason Sudeikis/Rob Riggle hybrid. Human Giant is brilliant (I hate using terms like Brilliant, but any show that features H. Jon Benjamin is just that).

9. The Andy Milonakis Show
Two nights ago I had a dream that I was dating Andy Milonakis. We got into a ton of fights and I eventually broke up with him cause I didn't like dating a 14-year-old look-a-like. Then he called be a predjudiced bitch and said that me breaking up with him is the same as dating Peter Dinklage and then breaking up with him because he 'doesn't look normal'. I then zinged him by saying that his theory didn't work because Peter Dinklage looks like the 39-year-old that he is. Ouch. I felt really bad. Andy Milonakis reminds me so much of this one Batman: The Animated Series episode about a child star with a growth-hormone condition.
(Ed. note - it was the episode about Mary Dahl)

8. Ace of Cakes
I love baking and I love icing cakes. I'm fairly decent at it, but all my stuff looks like piles of cat puke after I watch Duff Goldman throw together a Bar Mitzvah cake. Also, if you ever watch AoC, you will be familiar with Geof. I LOVE GEOF!!!

7. American Dad
Family Guy is terrible. This we all know. But I actually watch American Dad week after week, and it is very very watchable!

6. MTVs The Paper
Holy shit, was I ever addicted to this show back in February of 2008. I watched every episode 3 times. I then turned a co-worker into a Paperhead, and she turned a friend onto it. And so on. And so forth...

5. How I Met Your Mother
This show is getting a bad rap because I think a lot of people are confusing it with your average shitty CBS sitcom (like According to Jim) and it isn't. For the love of god, it isn't!! Anything with NPH is great. Thanks for playing, see you never.

4. 30 Rock
Ooh, how the mighty have fallen. Last year I have 30 Rock the prestigious spot at #1, but this year it failed to keep me interested. The writers strike, wacky plots (Jennifer Aniston? Really?) and Tina Fey becoming pretty egomaniacal (admit it, she is. Her head is like a swollen watermellon). But Tracy Morgan and Judah Friedlander save it for me week after week, and Jane Krakowski isn't totally irritating me as of late (which is good, cause she can be a pain in the ass).

3. Flight of the Conchords
Brit and Jimmaine are Jesus. It's a kimmra phone.

2. Judge Judy
There is no show I watch every single day, twice a day, 1/2 hour worth of clips on YouTube, more than Her Holiness herself, Judge Judith Sheindlin. I can only pray that I will be 1/18th as hot as her when I'm a memaw. Memaws delivering swift justice! One time this woman told me that she didn't like JJ because she said she thinks that JJ picks on the scuzzy Defendants (aka JJ be profiling). Fuck you, bitch!! I just about came through the phone and slapped a ho for talking that shit! JJ sets liars and lowlives straight and that janky-ass ho can't handle the troof!

1. Law & Order: SVU
Dundun!! You know I love me some SVU. This year is got good. Stabler got hotter (how is that possible?), Mariska started to get prison-rape flashbacks, Ice T stepped up to the plate and became a good-ass detective, Angela Bower came back (yess!!!), and John Munch became my personal hero. There is nothing about SVU I don't like. It's the best, Jerry - the best!

UPDATE!!! A very smart reader noticed that I didn't include The Soup. How could I not?!?! I fell asleep at the wheel, people, and I just hit a bus full of school children and grannies. Allow me to fix this:

The Real #1. The Soup
Dear Joel McHale
I am so sowwy that I forgot you, Spaghetti Cat, Lou the Chihuahua, and little Seth Green. I can't believe how negligent I have been; I will blame it on my day-to-day abuse of Ambien-PM.
Luv, The Mayor


Anonymous said...

Why is the "The Soup" not on your list?

Anonymous said...
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