2.18.2009

Rest in Peace, Lil' Angel

Click here to make big (...and your heart sad).

I don't know if you are familiar with the ins and outs of Mickey Rourke's life, but a few things are constant:

- La Rourke is always very glamorous and well-dressed
- La Rourke never smells like stale beer and Cheetos
- La Rourke is an amazing rassler (it's not an act!)
- If you are nominated for an award in the same category as La Rourke, you will lose
- La Rourke's red carpet date is always his chee-a-hoo-a-hoo-a Loki

But sadly, this Sunday Mickey won't be bringing little Loki to the 81st Academy Awards...because she is in Goggie Heaven. Mickey has been known to adopt many a stray or near-death puppers, but Loki was his favourite. He took her to the Golden Globes, the SAGs, strip clubs, shopping on Rodeo Drive, to the Lil Wayne show, everything. And now, the only place 18 year old Loki is going is into the oven to be smelted down with about 20 other dogs (WHAT? That's how it's done people. You think the only ashes in that urn on your mantle are Patchie's? Nope. You got a cocktail of Patchie, Snuffy, Rover Hendrix et al).

But while many of you believe that Loki is in Goggie Heaven, I believe she is on Rainbow Bridge. What is Rainbow Bridge, you ask? Well let me tell you! It's only my favourite thing to talk about! When your pet dies, it goes to the Rainbow Bridge. It's a great place where all the pets get their favourite snacks and their nuts back. The Rainbow Bridge also connects Earth and People Heaven (kind of like a highway, or a toll freeway). Anyways, when you die, you need to take the Rainbow Bridge to get to Heaven. Along the way, you will be reunited with your pets! Then you all walk through the gates of Heaven together! Awww, I know, right? Anyways, Loki will be waiting for Randy The Ram Robinson on the Rainbow Bridge, and that ain't half bad.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I love this photo.

alex davey illustrations said...

While I was frantically trying to figure out a thesis, I did much research on the Rainbow Bridge. Imagine a thesis based on Rainbow Bridge? Portraits of Loki?
A+!

Anonymous said...

Sadly Loki was his second pup that passed away in a month. Someone just give him the Oscar now!

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