So...I'm going back to Merica

Yep, so I'm going to Flordia...again. I know, you're probably sick to death of Florida/Canadian Smugness posts, but guess what? I'm not! Merica is amazing, and I plan on blogging about this trip so thoroughly, your spray-cheese-filled brains will 'splode. But this isn't just any trip to Florida, oh no. It's going to be better than a post about Cracker Barrel. It's going to be better than a post about swap-meets. It's going to be better than a post about those shitty sea shell-selling tourist traps on the beach. This time I'm going all out; I'm going toooooooooooooo
Hells yes!! I, a grown-ass adult woman, am going to Walt Disney World in Orlando, FL. I'm also going to Epcot (awesome), Universal (pretty cool, I wanna ride the JAWS ride), and Universal Islands of Adventure (seriously the best place on earth).

This will be my 3rd time to the Magic Kingdom, 2nd time to Epcot and both Universals. I'm pretty siked because the last time I went to Epcot, it was the first year of Michael Jackson's Captain EO and I was 3 (I'M OLD, DEAL WITH IT). You got these sick purple 3D glasses but I was only 3 and had NO FUCKING CLUE how to deal with 3D glasses - I did not get it at all. So the whole time I was sitting there being like "THIS FUCKING SUCKS FIND ME MICKEY OR A STAR WARS OR SOMETHING" and I didn't enjoy it. I regret being such a tard, because I am amp-a-lamped to see it again. MJ lives! Anyways, the Magic Kingdom is going to be a great place for second chances too, since the last time I went I had to be dragged on to the Haunted Mansion ride by my Grandmother. Oh, did I mention I was 9 YEARS OLD? Yeah, too damn old to be askaird of fake ghosts and haunted-happy music. I was FREAKED. OUT. I hid my head in my hands for the whole ride and what I did manage to see gave me nightmares for weeks. Yeah, um, we're still talking about Disney's Haunted Mansion; the one that 4 year olds can go on and have a good time? Yeah, same one. So this time I'm going to definitely go on it and enjoy it and hopefully won't cry or faint or have nightmares for life. Oh, and I didn't open my eyes on Space Mountain either because I was scared I was going to die. I know, it kills me to know me. Aight, see you in a few! Next time you hear from me, I'll be in MURRRRRICAAAA!!!


Alice said...

Enjoy! I've been to Disneyworld and Disneyland a few times - have a mickey-head shaped belgian waffle for me!

Also, now that your an adult you can go to Epcot and drink beers from around the world, get drunk, punch and/or fondle a mascot and get kicked out - hooray!

casu marzu said...

I had the best corn dog I've had in my entire life at Disneyland.

I strongly recommend them.